Sunday, July 03, 2005

Fourth of july, families and well.........

i love the fourth of july holiday. it allows me some extra time off from my boring, mundane , unfullfilling job. it allows me to pursue my alcoholism while my wife drives. on the other hand it also allows you the opportunity to listen to the same tired bitching over and over. oh well, you really dont get to pick your family now do you? now saturday i got to sit around with my in-laws while they bad mouth each other behind each others back. this may sound horrible to some but to the rest of us with average families this is just typical party fair. luckily enough i've been able to steer clear of the fighting. this might be due to the fact that when it comes to civilized conversation i shoot the wounded. i hold nothing back and as i explore my alcoholism i hold back even less. the worst part of all of this is that i've heard the stories a million times before and yet they are told as if its breaking news. sunday was different. we went to see my brother who lives about thirty miles from me. this is the brother who i fought with like ali-frazier growing up (me being frazier which means once in a while i got in a lucky punch but almost always just ended up getting my ass beat). we've gone closer over the years. some would say its because of similar expirences but actually its because hes the funniest son of a bitch i know. he could tell you jokes for an hour, none of which you had ever heard before, all of which would leave you bent over catching your breath trying to write them down so your lame ass could tell them the next work day. we all went fishing (which i havent done in twenty years) and the cooked out. a truly wonderful day that leaves me wishing he lived closer. now the fourth will be spent with the same in-laws from saturday. i will hear the same stories about each one (not , of course, while they are in the room) and i'll drink heavily to get through. my wife's cousin is a wonderful person who will start cooking at four in the morning and cook a buffet breakfast for a couple of hundred people then its the parade and then on to swimming and dinner. i must say though that when it comes to my in-laws its nice being the 800 pound gorilla that nobody screws with for fear of feeling my drunken verbal wrath. children be damned but if i have to drop an f or c-bomb on you to win the argument....well alls fair in war. so everyone enjoy your fourth. drink well....DONT DRIVE. be glad your where you are and its not with me.

sorry about no posts this week. it was a busy week and i really just didnt have the time. regular posts will be back


ccw said...

I think maybe we are long, lost relatives.

Happy 4th of July! I'm off to the parade.

Grampapinhead said...

Glad to see you are back.

In-laws? Can't help you there unless you like living alone, like myself.

As always... Rachael said...

Oh, the gossiping family grape vine. I love them, but I'm glad I only see them once per year, and that my kids will never know them... that may sound awful, but the vipers in my family will attack anyone, even children... and if you live a good, they are simply forced to make up shit about you.

Hey - but have fun getting drunk! Be happy you have someone to cart your too-drunk-to-drive-ass around!

Assorted Babble by Suzie said...

Hell with the in-laws, that is my family!! (lol) Moved to FL because of it. Now gossip about each other passes around by phone.

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