Monday, December 31, 2007

HAPPY NEW YEAR


enjoy yourselves but dont overdo it. i dont have many readers and i cant afford to lose any

Friday, December 07, 2007

Tipsy moose beginning to look a lot like Christmas



Bull moose strung with lights and tipsy on crab apples






What do you call a bull moose tangled in Christmas lights and drunk on fermented crab apples, standing glassy-eyed and dizzy in the front yard of a downtown bar?
(answer at the end)



But seriously, the juiced moose had certainly seen better days than Tuesday, when he became a bewildered tourist attraction, parked in the courtyard of Bernie's Bungalow Lounge as shoppers clicked by with their Nordstrom bags.



After Town Square Park, the moose squeezed into the courtyard at Bernie's, where he settled in a pile of crab apples and eventually assumed a disoriented stance, staring into space, snorting steam. What was on his moose mind? Was he dreaming of chewing spring buds or sleeping in the tall summer grass? Was he filled with crab-appletini regret? Hard to say.
"He's just been in the same spot since I got here," said Gina Senior, a bartender at Bernie's. "He's not really doing much except standing there."
You can't do much for a drunk moose except wait for him to sober up, Sinnott said. And he's in a pretty good place -- among Bernie's fountains and yard sculptures, behind a hedge, safe from passing traffic.






this reminds me of my friends dad. at christmas he would get all pissed drunk and stagger around outdoors. maybe he was reincarnated.....









btw the answer is buzzwinkle............

Police: Woman made up sex assault



A woman who said she was sexually assaulted by a robber in Little Havana in October made up the story because she ''was undergoing marital problems,'' police said Wednesday.
Adriana Velasquez, 28, who had recounted her story in a teary press conference last month, was charged with filing a false report with law enforcement.
Velasquez had claimed that on Oct. 28, as she opened up the family's Little Havana business, two men robbed her. One cut off her clothes and sexually assaulted her -- stopping only because she had pressed an alarm, she claimed.
She had even given detectives a detailed description of the attacker: He had a dime-size mole over the left side of his mouth and a tattoo on his forearm that read ``Love Mom.''
Detectives began realizing that the story didn't add up when they failed to get tips after the press conference. They had also rushed DNA swabs to the lab. Samples came back negative.
''It seems to be a cry for attention. But her cry for attention violated the trust of the police, the media and the public,'' Miami police spokesman Bill Schwartz said.
She admitted to making up the story about the sexual assault, even though she insisted she had been robbed. Detectives don't believe her.



does that mugshot say it all?

Police: Pantsless man found smoking crack in vehicle

WESTMINSTER -- Police arrested a man Monday afternoon who they found sitting in his car by the side of the road with his pants down on the bitterly cold and stormy day, according to Police Chief Sam Albert.
"He was pulled over at the side of the road with his pants down around his ankles and smoking crack," Albert said.
Michael P. O'Rourke, 55, of 268 Central St., in Gardner, is charged with indecent exposure and possession of a Class B drug, Albert said.
Albert said the case is unusual for Westminster.
"That's a first time," he said about the incident.
Police got a call Monday afternoon from a driver who passed O'Rourke's car and saw he was not wearing pants.
Police went to Town Farm Road and found O'Rourke sitting in his parked car, Albert said. O'Rourke told police he has a substance-abuse problem, Albert said.
"He admitted he was a crack addict," Albert said.
There was a smoldering crack pipe in the car and eight more unopened baggies each with a crack rock on the car seat, according to Albert.
O'Rourke declined to explain to police why he had his pants pulled down, Albert said.
"He didn't want to talk about that," he said.
O'Rourke is being held on $2,000 cash bail following his arraignment in Gardner District Court, Albert said.
O'Rourke did not tell officers where he bought the crack or where he was going Monday afternoon, Albert said. He told police he spent $40 on crack on Monday, Albert said.






pants off? what kind of crack is he smoking?

Man sentenced in bizarre satellite diagnosing scam

A man was sentenced to more than four years in prison for bilking friends and family out of more than $800,000 by convincing them that his wife was a government agent who could arrange to have their medical problems diagnosed by satellite imaging.
Brent Eric Finley, 38, of Rayville, was sentenced in federal court in Monroe to serve 51 months in prison followed by three years of supervised release. His wife, Stacey Finley, was sentenced in August to spend 63 months in prison and both are ordered to jointly pay restitution in the amount of $873,786.94.
The Finleys pleaded guilty in August to wire fraud, according to court records.
U.S. Attorney Donald W. Washington said in a news release following Monday's sentencing of Brent Finley that the couple convinced numerous people that Stacey Finley was a CIA agent and with her contacts she could schedule a medical scan of the victims' bodies by satellite imaging that would detect any hidden medical problems.
The Finley's convinced their victims that, if any medical problems were found, secret agents would administer medicine to them as they slept in exchange for payment, according to a bill of information filed when the Finleys were charged in May.
"These audacious criminals should remind all of us that scam artists will go to great lengths to take our life's savings," Washington said.




actually these audacious criminals should serve to remind us that there are some real rubes living in fort wayne.

Cops use department helichopter for a doughnut run.

No one begrudges a cop his or her doughnuts, but questions are being asked in Albuquerque about one recent case in which a pair of the city's finest dropped in for a box of Krispy Kremes in a police helicopter.

Eyewitnesses said a Kiowa OH-58 chopper owned by the Albuquerque Police Department -- which reportedly costs taxpayers about $80 an hour to fuel and fly, not including salaries and benefits for two crew members -- came swooping in out of the night sky one recent evening. It circled several times around its intended target, then alighted in a nearby lot while a passenger went in for a box of doughnuts. Mission accomplished, the chopper buzzed off, sounding the siren by way of bidding onlookers adieu.

While most observers seemed to take the sighting in stride, a doughnutshop employee who watched the scene unfold wasn't so amused. "I was angry, and I'm still a little angry," the witness told the Albuquerque Journal. "That's my tax dollars, your tax dollars. You've got no business flying in to get doughnuts."
Naturally, such complaints have led to a police investigation. "Between the two of them, I don't know how they decided that was a good idea," a police-department official told the newspaper. "If they violated policy or procedure, they're going to get disciplined for it. We've worked too hard to make this a professional unit to let lack of common sense tear us down."






Thats some fine police work there Lou.

Motorcyclist riding with rattler critcally injured in crash



A motorcyclist was critically injured Wednesday afternoon when twine that secured an apparently dead 5-foot rattlesnake to the back of the bike he was riding may have come loose and distracted him as he entered a curve on Almonaster Avenue, police said.
Police accident investigators don't know how, when or where the cyclist had gotten the rattlesnake, and where he was taking it or why. But they said they believed the presence of the snake and the possibility that the driver was trying to keep it from falling off the bike while heading into a right-hand bend in the eastern New Orleans road caused the accident.


"It was one of the strangest accidents I've responded to in my 37 years on the New Orleans Police Department," said Lt. Melvin Howard, assistant commander of the Traffic Division.
The man lost control of his 650 cc BMW motorcycle and struck a curb as he headed west in the 5900 block of Almonaster Avenue about 1:15 p.m., police said. The impact threw the driver across the median and into the eastbound lanes where he came to rest, his yellow helmet left in the westbound lanes as was his motorcycle, police and a witness said.
He was taken to a local hospital in "very critical" condition, police said.
The lone witness to the accident, Matt Rutan, said the motorcyclist sped past his truck as he was driving back from the landfill.
"At first I thought it was a piece of rope dragging behind the motorcycle," Rutan said, referring to what later turned out to be a 5-foot canebrake rattlesnake secured by twine to the motorcycle.
The motorcycle got at most a half-mile ahead of Rutan, he said, when he saw the cyclist "lift up a little and twist around in his seat like he was attending to something on the back of his bike."
In doing so, the driver failed to negotiate a right-hand curve in the road and struck what Rutan judged to be an eight-inch concrete curb. The driver was ejected from the motorcycle and came to rest about 150 feet down the road, on the opposite side of a grassy median, Rutan said. He said the motorcycle flipped many times and ended up in the westbound lanes more than 200 feet down the road.
Rutan stopped his truck and called 911 as he ran to the driver and saw he was apparently unconscious, he said.
An ambulance responded within 10 minutes, he said.
Rutan discovered that what he had thought was a rope was really
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you know i was just thinking that it would be a good idea to tie a snake to my bike and ride around . thank god i saw this story and saw the error of my ways.................

Hawaii police dispatcher sues city

A "game" played during work hours by Honolulu Police Department emergency telephone operators resulted in one operator suffering a detached retina after being struck in the eye by a ball thrown by another operator, according to a lawsuit filed in state court this week.
The lawsuit was filed by emergency operator Sally Crowder against the city and co-worker Flossie Leong.
HPD spokeswoman Michelle Yu, responding for the department and for Leong, declined comment, saying the suit had not yet been served on the defendants.
Crowder is a civilian employee in HPD's communications division, handling police radio communications as well as emergency 911 telephone calls.
According to her suit, the game began sometime before May, and players threw a small ball — slightly smaller than a tennis ball — at each other's backs during work.
Some of the players "would attempt to throw the ball with enough force to make the co-worker who was struck by the ball verbally express pain," the suit charged. Crowder alleged she was "repeatedly" struck by the missile in the back of the head and both eyes.
Another co-worker asked a supervisor to stop the game-playing but the supervisor declined because the "game was therapeutic," the suit alleged.
On May 28, a ball allegedly thrown by Leong struck Crowder in the left eye "with such force that her retina was detached, requiring surgery," the lawsuit said.
Crowder's supervisor, unnamed in the lawsuit, did not stop the game-playing after Crowder's injury but did order it discontinued after Crowder filed a workers' compensation claim, according to the suit. Crowder's workers' compensation claim was later denied by the city, the lawsuit said.
Crowder is seeking unspecified damages for what she alleges are "serious and permanent injuries" and mental and emotional distress.







i guess my mom was right. its not a party until someone loses an eye..............

Thursday, December 06, 2007

The spawn of nancy grace


is anyone else suprised that this shark didnt eat these kids as soon as she squeezed them out..............

Britney and Paris top Santa's naughty list: poll

NEW YORK (Reuters) - When Britney Spears and Paris Hilton open their stockings on Christmas Day, they shouldn't be surprised to find a lump of coal.

A poll of American children released on Wednesday found that the two high-profile celebrities should top Santa's naughty list.

The online survey of 1,107 children was conducted by E-Poll Market Research, which specializes in celebrity and brand research, to gauge children's attitudes about nice, naughty, and the seasonal question of who makes Santa's list.
Spears, whose stint in rehabilitation, panty-less pictures, and custody battle for her children has won headlines globally, was awarded top "naughty" honors with younger and older children.
She was followed on the list by Paris Hilton who spent three weeks in jail this year on a driving violation.
The two women beat out Swiper the Fox from the television show Dora the Explorer, the Grinch from the book "How The Grinch Stole Christmas" and Darth Vader from Star Wars among children 2-12.





in defense of paris and britney they also finished behind the grinch and darth vader on my poll of people i'd fuck.

Florida again, why am i not suprised....

Police: 300-Pound Hooker Robs Reluctant Customer



FORT PIERCE, Fla. -- A 300-pound prostitute robbed a man of $100 before pedaling away on a blue bicycle, according to a police report.
The case of the hefty hooker happened about 1:10 a.m. Monday as the 32-year-old man rode his bicycle when the assailant came up to him.
"The female approached asking (the alleged victim) did he want a date, which meant she wanted him to pay for some sex," the report states.
The man told investigators he felt sorry for the woman and pulled $10 from his wallet to give to her. That's when she allegedly pushed him off his bicycle and wrestled him down. She snatched his wallet, stole $100 and then pedaled off.
The alleged victim, who wasn't injured, described his assailant as weighing 300 pounds and clad in blue jeans and a white T-shirt.
An officer searched the area but couldn't find the woman.





ok, calling it the case of the "hefty hooker" is just too much for me. i'm pretty sure i could run down a 300 pound woman on a bike. hell, i think i would have just pedalled away in the first place.

Pastor of Washington County church charged with sex crimes

The pastor of a small Washington County Baptist Church was arrested and charged with second-degree rape and second-degree sodomy in connection with a nearly 10-year-old incident involving a 15-year-old girl, authorities said.
The Rev. Leonard Frazier, 55, of Stonewall Baptist Church near Chatom, was booked into Mobile County Metro Jail on Tuesday on the basis of a grand jury indictment. He was released on bail totaling $15,000, according to jail records.
A phone call made to Frazier's home in Mount Vernon on Tuesday evening resulted in no comment. No one answered the telephone at the church today.
The alleged victim is now in her mid-20s, said Steve Giardini, the Mobile County assistant district attorney who prosecutes child-abuse cases.
"It took a number of years for her to come forward," he said.
There is no statute of limitations in Alabama involving sex crimes against children.
State law holds that second-degree rape happens when someone 16 years old or older engages in sexual intercourse with a member of the opposite sex who is less than 16 years old and more than 12 years old, provided that the offender is two years older than the victim.
Giardini said he was unsure if the woman has ever been a member of Stonewall Baptist Church. She is not a blood relative to Frazier but did know him through her family, the prosecutor said.







i understand that he did this because he was tired of "the catholics" getting all the good press with them raping altar boys and such". i guess he better retire his wwjd wrist band.

Police: Teen Pulled Heists, Kept Curfew

Police: Indiana Teen Says He Robbed Businesses, but Kept His Curfew and Attended Church



A teenager says he held up a dozen businesses in part to get "gas money" but made sure the heists wouldn't make him miss curfew or church on Sundays with his mom.
Justin T. Veal, 18, was jailed on a felony robbery charge after being arrested last week in a liquor store holdup.

He told detectives he robbed about a dozen businesses of an estimated $10,000 this year for "money to fix his car, to buy jewelry, to keep up with everyone else," Indianapolis police Sgt. Kerry Buckner said.
Veal said in an interview at the Marion County Jail that he watched the clock, making sure he finished the robberies in time to make it home before the 1:30 a.m. curfew set by his mother.
"Curfew is 1:30. Her rules, her house. Make it in by 1:30," Veal told television station WTHR Wednesday.
Police say Veal stayed close to home for several of the robberies and that while he had a weapon in each of the holdups, no one was injured.
"He didn't do a robbery on Thanksgiving and he never did a robbery on Sunday because his mother made him go to church every Sunday," Buckner said.
Veal says he was desperate for extra money.
"I had just got hired to two new jobs and really, I just needed some gas money," he said. "It was the easy way. Sometimes you never think you're going to get caught."


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now who says that kids these days arent motivated to do well. thank god that hes a good church going young man...........

Two Pasco men arrested over $12 bar tab






New Port Richey, Florida – Two Pasco county men were arrested Monday night for allegedly refusing to pay a $12.25 bill.
According to police reports, Christopher Herbert of Port Richey and Jerry Campbell of Hudson spent the evening at Jilly’s Tavern on the 5300 block of Main Street in New Port Richey.
Jule Clark, a head bartender at the tavern, says their combined $24.50 bill included a total of eight mixed drinks.
“They were all Rum and Cokes,” Clark said.
When asked to pay, Clark says the men refused. After four opportunities, the bartender decided to call police.
Herbert and Campbell were arrested and booked at the Land O’Lakes jail, each facing a single misdemeanor charge of defrauding an innkeeper.
But apparently, they weren’t completely out of cash. Each came up with $150 to bond out of jail.



why didnt they just pay the bill, they never been in jail? they look like two real classy guys.....

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Lack of Mail From Tila Tequila Prompts Hostility Toward Officer

A 19-year-old Chehalis man who reportedly punched a police officer in the face multiple times Tuesday did so because "Tila Tequila would not respond to his e-mail" and because the officer took the man's nunchaku, according to Bremerton police reports.
Officers were called to a Perry Avenue shopping center shortly after 5 p.m. for a report of shoplifters at a grocery store, reports said. Two men, the 19-year-old and an 18-year-old Mossyrock man, had apparently stuffed items into their clothes but then put them back on the shelves, reports said.
The store's manager and the police still wanted to talk to the pair. After a search of their car, which the 18-year-old consented to, the officer found a nunchaku weapon, which he confiscated as a dangerous weapon.
The 19-year-old, after being patted down by the officer, turned around and punched him in the face, reports said. He and another officer pursued the man on foot, and when they caught up to the man, he punched the same officer again, breaking his glasses, reports said.
The officer delivered several "palm" and "knee strikes" to the 19-year-old's "facial area" before another officer could apply his Taser and place the man into handcuffs.
Both the 19-year-old and officer were treated for injuries.
While driving the man to jail, the officer asked the man why he was mad. The man replied that the MTV reality show star wouldn't reply to his e-mail and that the officer took his nunchaku, reports said.
The man was booked into the Kitsap County jail on suspicion of assault of an officer and possession of a dangerous weapon. His bail was set at $100,000.



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lets sum this up. a man who didnt get a reply from a cheap internet whore then smacked a cop and got tasered and went to jail. did i miss anything? good luck in the joint asshole.....

Police: Foiled Birthday Drug Wish Leads To Stabbing

TAMPA - Phil Edward Johnson wanted to celebrate his birthday with $20 worth of cocaine, police say. But when his brother didn't come up with the drugs, a report says, Johnson stabbed him twice in the stomach.
Police arrested Johnson, 54, Tuesday afternoon. He faces one count of attempted first-degree murder.
His brother, John Butler Tyler, told police it was Johnson's birthday and that Johnson gave him $20 to buy cocaine for them, a police report states.
Tyler, 37, told police he gave the money to someone who was supposed to buy the cocaine. When Johnson learned his brother didn't buy the drugs but handed the $20 to someone else, he got angry and pulled a knife from his pocket, according to the report.
Johnson stabbed his brother twice in the stomach and caused defensive wounds on his brother's wrist, police say.
The stabbing occurred near Robles Park. Tyler went to a friend's apartment nearby and banged on the door for help. The friend called 911.
Officers found Tyler barely conscious at that apartment, 311 E. Ohio Ave.
Tyler was taken to St. Joseph's Hospital with injuries that weren't life-threatening. He was listed in stable condition Wednesday.
Tyler couldn't provide an exact location of the stabbing at the park, the police report states.
Johnson, of 2402 E. Fourth Ave., Apt. B, was held Wednesday in Orient Road Jail without bail.



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i'll bet he gets all of his gifts, on time , next year...........

Just follow the lightning trail.......

Jefferson County Sheriff’s detectives are investigating a burglary and larceny at a Theresa church.
Rev. Mark R. Reilly, pastor of St. Theresa of Avila Catholic Church, told investigators someone had taken a ciborium from the church sometime between midday on November 20th and midday November 24th.
A ciborium is a metal container with a cover used for the storage of consecrated communion hosts. According to Fr. Reilly, the missing ciborium was filled with consecrated wafers.
The ciborium was removed from a locked tabernacle. The key to the tabernacle was kept in a cupboard in the sacristy, a room near the church altar.
The cupboard was discovered open on Saturday. Nothing else seemed out of order.
The gold plated ciborium is valued at approximately $100.


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is this really what you want to be stealing?

Flasher's 'inadequacy' plea fails

A man convicted of being a serial flasher told a court he could not be guilty as his genitals were too small.
Michael Carney, 41, claimed he was too embarrassed about the size of his manhood to expose himself to women and showed the court photographs as proof.
But the jury at Teesside Crown Court convicted the father-of-two, of Stockton, Teesside of seven counts of outraging public decency.
The jury was then told he was earlier found guilty of five sexual assaults.
'Smaller than average'
Carney, of Fleetham Grove, will be sentenced for the flashing and sex assaults next year.
During the three-day trial the defendant told the court: "It causes embarrassment to myself, even to the point where it is with my wife. I wouldn't want myself to be seen in public like that.
"My genitalia are underdeveloped and it is so much smaller than average."
He showed the jury photographs taken by his wife to prove his claims.
Jail 'likely'
But the jury convicted him of flashing in front of six different women over a number of years.
The court heard that on most occasions, he exposed himself to passers-by while standing naked in the front window of his home.
But he was also spotted naked on the driveway of his home.
The court also heard he had already been convicted of sexually assaulting five females in his local area while out jogging.
Judge Brian Forster told Carney he was likely to receive a jail sentence, before granting the quality inspector for a plastics firm bail.


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is this really the plea you want to use in court? is this how you want the world to see you? even if it worked (and it didnt) how could you ever go back to the corner pub again? imagine what the guys would say to you /how could you ever chat up a broad again?

these are questions i need answers to.............

Stupidest man ever................

Naked woman discovered in apartment



A Chandler resident discovered a naked woman sleeping in an apartment early Tuesday morning, but it's unclear how she got there. Police were called to an apartment in the 100 block of South Alma School Road about 4 a.m. Tuesday after the resident discovered an unknown woman sleeping au natural in a bedroom. The naked woman, Jacquelyn M. Pearson, 25, told police she did not remember entering the apartment and that her last memory was that of getting ready for work, according to a police report. Her boyfriend told police Pearson dropped him off at work, said she felt ill and needed to head home. Pearson told police she was not intoxicated, injured or using any type of drug, and that she had no legitimate reason for being in the apartment - but could not explain how she ended up there, the report stated.



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shouldnt he have questioned her at length? gave her a cavity search? anything? why does this never happen to me............................

Assist. Band Director accused of having student audition for 1st chair skin flute.

Assist. Band Director Accused Of Sex With Band Member



WEST MILTON, Ohio -- Investigators in Miami County said the assistant band director of Milton-Union High School is in jail, accused of having sex with a band member.
Anthony Spahr, 28, was indicted on one count of sexual battery.
Superintendent Ginny Rammel said that Spahr had just begun his third year at the school. She said that on Oct. 5, the school received an anonymous tip that Spahr was involved in inappropriate behavior.
Rammel said she is very angry and upset about what has happened.
Capt. Dave Duchek said that during the first investigation, they found out about a possible second victim, and they are looking into that.
School officials said after conducting an internal investigation, Spahr was immediately dismissed.
Deputies in Miami County issued an arrest warrant for Spahr and he was taken into custody on Tuesday at his home in Troy.
He is being held in the Miami County Jail.


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female teachers and male band directors seem to be the rosetta stone of school molestations. this one is brought to you by the state of ohio.....

Prostitute auctions sex for charity

SANTIAGO (Reuters) - A Chilean prostitute has auctioned 27 hours of sex to raise money for the country's largest charity during an annual fund-raising campaign.
Maria Carolina became an overnight celebrity in the conservative Roman Catholic country, making news headlines and appearing on talk shows since she made her unusual donation to the televised charity event, which runs for 27 hours starting on Friday evening.
"I've already auctioned off the 27 hours of love," Maria Carolina told Reuters on Wednesday, saying she had raised about $4,000. "One of my clients already paid. It seemed like a good deed to him."
Adult prostitution is legal in Chile. Chile's two-day Teleton fundraiser is endorsed by television stars and aims to raise funds for poor, disabled children.
Speaking about Maria Carolina's unusual donation, campaign organizer Mario Kreutzberger said he would not encourage "immoral" activities, but said he would accept her pledge.
"Everyone can do what they want, but if someone tells me that they'll do something immoral ... I'm not going to encourage it," Kreutzberger, who as "Don Francisco" hosts the long-running "Sabado Gigante" program on the U.S. Spanish-language Univision network, told local media.
But Maria Carolina, who advertises her services on the Internet, defended her money-raising scheme.
"There are people who are going to be donating money that's a lot more questionable than mine," she said. "The only thing I did was publicize it."


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what are the odds that jerry lewis is using this technique next year. you have to admit that this young lady gives and gives.............

Friday, November 30, 2007

25 great drinking quotes.......

1


Beer, the cause of and solution to, all life's problems.
Homer Simpson
2

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal labotomy.
Tom Waits. Man, he has a way with words.
3

All right, brain, I don't like you and you don't like me - so let's just do this and I'll get back to killing you with beer.
Homer Simpson
4

I drink to make other people interesting.
George Jean Nathan.
5

Work is the curse of the drinking classes
Oscar Wilde. Another master of putting words together in ways that stick true.
6

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.
Frank Sinatra
7

The Smoker You Drink, The Player You Get
Joe Walsh
8

Not everyone who drinks is a poet. Some of us drink because we're not poets
Arthur, played by Dudley Moore.
9

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
Anonymous
10

They talk of my drinking but never my thirst.
Scottish saying.
11

When I realized that what I had turned out to be was a lousy, two-bit pool hustler and drunk, I wasn't depressed at all. I was glad to have a profession.
Danny McGoorty
12

Drinking is a way of ending the day.
Earnest Hemingway.
13

I never eat breakfast on an empty stomach.
WC Fields
14

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.
Earnest Hemingway
15

You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least you need a beer.
Frank Zappa
16

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer.
Henry Lawson
17

This is one of the disadvantages of wine; it makes a man mistake words for thoughts.
Samuel Johnson
18

The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.
Richard Braunstein
19

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds, and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.
George Best
20

There can't be good living where there is not good drinking.
Ben Franklin
21

They say some of my stars drink whiskey, but I have found that the ones who drink milkshakes don't win many ball games.
Casey Stengel
22

I'm not a heavy drinker, I can sometimes go for hours without touching a drop.
Noel Coward
23

Why is there so much wine left at the end of my money?
Milan Maximovich
24

Do not allow children to mix drinks. It is unseemly and they use too much vermouth.
Steve Allen. Love the glasses!
25

The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass.
Martin Mull

Dr. Robert Cade, Gatorade inventor, dies at 80

Dr. Robert Cade, the lead inventor of Gatorade and a University of Florida professor, died Tuesday morning, his family confirmed. He was 80.

Along with a team of other scientists, Cade created the popular sports drink in 1965. Since that time, Gatorade has become a boon for UF, generating $150 million in royalties for the university and helping to establish UF as a premier research institution.
Dr. Jim Free, who worked under Cade in the creation of Gatorade, said Tuesday that Cade was first and foremost a kind man who made it his mission to spread knowledge.
"His contributions were so multiple that it's just hard to cover them," Free said. "His main contribution is that he was a very nice, decent, generous person, and that he was dedicated to education. He was a real educator, a real researcher and a real academician and held a real place of honor at the University of Florida because he spent his whole career there teaching and doing his research. The things he's accomplished have been amazing."
The story of Gatorade has become the stuff of legend, in both the worlds of sports and business. The drink was produced to help Gator football players deal with the sweltering Gainesville heat, which was leading to intense dehydration. It became much more than one team's secret beverage, however, and is now the "official" sports drink of the National Football League, the National Basketball Association, Major League Baseball and several other significant professional sports groups.
Of late, Cade has been the recipient of many honors bestowed by the university. He was inducted into the Gators' athletics hall of fame recently, and just this month a plaque was erected on campus proclaiming UF as the "birthplace of Gatorade."







he is to be cremated and his remains will be poured over the head of an ,as of yet, unnamed coach...........................

"Wang arrested for panty theft"

Penn student arrested in underwear thefts


A student at the University of Pennsylvania was charged after allegedly stalking female students at the school and stealing pairs of their underwear.
Diexia Wang, a Penn senior, was charged with burglary, criminal trespassing, harassment and theft after he allegedly stole underwear and purses from several women.
Southwest Detectives also are investigating whether Wang stalked a woman who lived in the Harold C. Mayer Residence Hall.
Police said Wang may also be linked to at least a half-dozen bizarre thefts on campus, according to media reports.
Wang was freed after his parents posted 10 percent of $200,000 bail.


i only posted this for the headline...............

Roberts Says God Forced His Resignation



TULSA, Okla. (AP) - Richard Roberts told students at Oral Roberts University Wednesday that he did not want to resign as president of the scandal-plagued evangelical school, but he did so because God insisted.
Roberts told students in the university's chapel that God told him on Thanksgiving that he should resign the next day.
Roberts said he resisted the idea, and that "every ounce of my flesh said 'no,'" but he prayed over the decision with his wife, Lindsay Roberts, and his father, Oral Roberts, and decided to step down.
A lawsuit accuses Roberts of lavish spending at a time when the university faced more than $50 million in debt. On Tuesday, the founder of a Christian office and education supply store chain pledged $70 million to help the university.
Roberts has previously said that God told him to deny the allegations. The week the lawsuit was filed, Richard Roberts said that God told: "We live in a litigious society. Anyone can get mad and file a lawsuit against another person whether they have a legitimate case or not. This lawsuit ... is about intimidation, blackmail and extortion."




he wanted to deny the allegation and the alligator. damn , i love that joke..anyway i tried to turn in my resignation to god but he wouldnt accept mine. he resisted it with every ounce of his strength but when he realized that he couldnt get out of this rap...er...i mean....god told him to resign, well, you cant say "no" to god.


just look at the picture. he looks like one of those elitist pieces of shit who would use goods name to fleece the flock. i sure hope hell has a special place for those assholes.

Grandmother, 35, Accused Of Leaving Boy On Home's Doorstep



ABINGTON, Pa. -- There has been a new development involving an abandoned baby left on an Abington Township doorstep earlier this month.
The baby's grandmother is now accused of leaving the infant out in the cold.


Baby Boy Doe" still may not have a name, but at least police said they finally know how the hours-old infant ended up on the steps of the home in Montgomery County back on the chilly evening of Nov. 8, NBC 10's Deanna Durante reported.
The newborn boy was found wearing clothes and wrapped in a blanket.


Abington police said in court papers filed Monday that those clothes were purchased by the baby's grandmother, 35-year-old Jacqueline Bethea at a Target store on Nov. 8.
It was after an anonymous tip to police that they learned the clothes and blankets found with the baby were sold at Target stores.
Court papers said police reviewed surveillance tape from that day and saw a woman buying the clothes.
Court documents also state that investigators obtained the Bank of America credit card number from the day's receipts and traced her to a home in the Frankford section of Philadelphia.


Police interviewed 35-year-old Bethea and her 17-year-old daughter. Police said in court documents that Bethea was at work, her daughter called saying she was in labor and by the time Bethea arrived home the boy had been born. Bethea's daughter had concealed her pregnancy from her mother.
The court papers said the grandmother bought clothes at the Target on Old York Road and the intention was to take the baby to Abington Memorial Hospital, which is down the street from the Target. But police said the 17-year-old and Bethea told police that they got scared and spotted a home around the corner from the hospital. They knocked on the door and left the baby outside.
According to court documents, Bethea told police, "It wasn't the intention to harm the baby. We were afraid. We didn't know what to do. We thought that we were doing the right thing at that time."
No one answered the door Monday at Bethea's home, although Durante reported that she did see people looking out the window.
The Frankford woman has been charged with endangering her newborn grandson.
Bethea was arraigned Monday morning and released on $5,000 unsecured bail. She has a court hearing scheduled for a few weeks from now.
The grandmother could have avoided charges had she gone through with leaving him at the nearby hospital. Under Pennsylvania's safe haven law, anyone may leave infants up to 28 days of age at local hospitals or health care providers.
The boy, now 3 weeks old, remains in the care of Montgomery County's Department of Children and Youth. Investigative sources told NBC 10 that they hope the child will be adopted to a good home.






do you have to see anything beyond the "35 year old grandmother" to see there was going to be a problem there.

Web User Sentenced for Killing Rival

BUFFALO, N.Y. (AP) - A 48-year-old man entangled in an Internet love triangle built largely on lies was sentenced Tuesday to 20 years in prison for killing his rival for the affection of a woman he had never met.
Thomas Montgomery, who posed as an 18-year-old Marine in online chats, pleaded guilty in August to gunning down Brian Barrett, 22, in a parking lot at the suburban Buffalo factory where they worked.
The motive was jealousy, investigators said. Both were involved online with a middle-aged West Virginia mother _ who herself was posing as an 18-year-old student.
Prosecutor Frank Sedita argued for the maximum sentence of 25 years, describing Montgomery's "almost predatory" pursuit of the woman and his resentment of Barrett when she cooled to Montgomery's advances after 1 1/2 years and thousands of pages of Internet chats.
"The chats reveal an obsessive desire to make Brian Barrett suffer," Sedita said.
Barrett, a college student who aspired to be an industrial arts teacher, was shot three times at close range after climbing into his truck at the end of a shift at Dynabrade in Clarence on Sept. 15, 2006. His body was found two days later by a co-worker.
"My wife and I don't understand how this could happen, how such evil could walk the Earth," Barrett's father, Daniel, said at the sentencing hearing. "To gun down a boy over simple jealousy does not make sense to us."
Montgomery's lawyer said fantasy and reality blurred for the then-married father of two teenage daughters, who was involved in his church and was president of his daughters' swim club.
"Until September 2006, this was a man who held his head high," attorney John Nuchereno said. "By September 2006 _ call it an obsession, call it an addiction, call it what you want _ he was suffering from a diminished capacity of some sort."
Montgomery, now divorced, attempted suicide in his jail cell after his arrest. He chose not to speak at his sentencing.
Montgomery began chatting with the woman, identified in court as Mary Sheiler, in 2005. Occasionally, the woman would mail packages to his home. When one of the packages was intercepted by Montgomery's wife, she wrote back, telling Sheiler her husband's true age and saying he was married.
Barrett, whom Montgomery had mentioned in his exchanges, was drawn into the triangle after the woman contacted him online to confirm what she had been told by Montgomery's wife.
Justice Penny Wolfgang called the situation a "consequence of misuse of the Internet."







let me get this straight.....A 48-year-old posing as an 18-year-old in an online love triangle with a middle aged WV mom posing as another 18-year-old. Sadly, the only one who was actually his age is the now dead 22-year-old who in reality was actually 22 years old.



what a wonderful world

Dude, you were supposed to ignore the story about Lot and his daughters



ANCHORAGE, Alaska - A man who called himself "Papa Pilgrim" and took his family far from civilization to raise them according to his interpretation of the Bible was sentenced to 14 years in prison for sexually assaulting a daughter.


A judge imposed the sentence Tuesday after Robert Hale's wife and many of their 15 children delivered statements that included intense stories of physical and mental abuse. Judge Donald Hopwood called it "one of the worst cases of domestic violence I've seen."
Hale and his family came to prominence during a feud with the National Park Service after family members used a bulldozer without permission to clear a road in Wrangell-St. Elias National Park
Hopwood sentenced Hale to 10 years in prison for sexual assault and two years each for incest and coercion.
Hale, 66, spent much of Tuesday on the stand, denying charges of sexual and physical abuse leveled against him by family members. Hopwood said he simply didn't believe Hale's denials because so many witnesses testified consistently.
Hale had been indicted on 30 counts of rape, incest, coercion, kidnapping and assault for crimes against one of his daughters, committed between 1998 and 2005.
On the eve of his trial last December, Hale pleaded no contest to the three counts in exchange for a sentence of 14 years. But he later tried to withdraw the plea. He said he had made a mistake because he had been sick in jail, on medications and was not well-represented by his public defender.
Last month, in a hearing to decide on his change of plea, Hale changed his mind again and returned to a no-contest plea.
Hale insisted that he had a perfect spiritual understanding, his wife, Kurina Rose Hale, testified Monday.
"This is how he justified all his immoral activity," she said.
Hale was accused of persuading one child that she was a "special kind of daughter" and that she must have sex with him.
The sexual abuse culminated with an incident in the tiny community of McCarthy, about 275 miles east of Anchorage in Wrangell-St. Elias.
That's where Hale locked his daughter in a shed for three days, sexually assaulted her and beat her so badly her face looked like a black and blue basketball, according to another daughter's testimony.
Another daughter and the abuse victim left the family grounds to notify authorities.
Hale ran from law enforcers for two weeks before he was taken into custody.
Other children testified of prolonged beatings at the hands of the family patriarch, including boys being stretched out over a "beating barrel" and lashed with a three-cord riding crop.




i guess he should have taken them to hogwarts to live in accordance to harry potter. crazy religious people gone wild. heres another guy who should just be taken out in the woods , made to kneel and then shot in the back of the head and left to the animals.
as i think about this the wife should be shot too.......

Wayne County Man Electrocuted

It's been a tragic Thanksgiving holiday for a Wayne county family. A Marion man was electrocuted while trying to pull his car out of ditch early Thursday morning.
Wayne County sheriff's deputies said Joseph Maliborski, 20, was using a tractor from a nearby farm to try to tow the car out of a ditch on ball road. The tractor made contact with low hanging power lines causing Maliborski's death.
The Wayne County Sheriff's Department is still trying to figure out exactly how this happened. Several residents who live nearby say they'll never forget what they saw.
Thomas Christensen woke up early Thanksgiving morning to a loud bang. He decided to get a closer look and found a grizzly scene.
"We looked out the dining room window and saw a bunch of commotion down here," Christensen said. "The tractor was burned up. There was really nothing left of it, other than just a shell."
Maliborski's family says he was on his way home from a friend's house and ended up in a ditch.
Another neighbor, James Salerno, saw most of what was going on though his living room window.
"He had had an accident it looked like he slid sideways and hit the pole," Salerno said.
The impact severed the telephone pole leaving the power lines hanging low to the ground.
"The kid should have just gone home and forgot about it and it wouldn't have been that bad you know," Christensen said.
Instead Salerno said Maliborski took a tractor from a nearby farm.
"He took one tractor stalled it and tore the transmission out of it trying to get up to the road," Salerno said.
Maliborski then went back to get a second tractor according neighbors. He was using it to pull his car out when the front loader became entangled in the power lines. The live wires set the tractor on fire. When Maliborski tried to escape he was electrocuted.







let me get this straight......Man crashes car into ditch, attempts to extract car with tractor but stalls it, sets second tractor on fire and electrocutes himself after hitting low-hanging power lines.





ta da..........................

Police: Woman put mom's body in garbage bags beside road

OCALA, Fla. -- A woman was arrested Tuesday after she told police she dumped the body of her 83-year-old mother into two garbage bags and left them beside the road, Marion County authorities said.
Debra Loreth, 53, of Belleview, told deputies she didn't report the death of her mother, Jeanne Vasa, because she wanted to cash the woman's retirement checks, according to the sheriff's office.
Loreth was charged with failure to report a death and was being held at the Marion County jail on $500 bond, jail officials said. It was not known if she had legal representation.
Detectives have filed paperwork with the State Attorney's Office seeking a charge of improper disposal of a body and one count of uttering a false instrument, for allegedly cashing her mother's retirement check.
Loreth originally told police her mother died on Sept. 4 and she didn't report it because she was being evicted, the Ocala Star-Banner reported. She asked a friend to call a cremation business and then moved out of the home, leaving her mother's body behind.
Loreth later told police she put her mother in two, black garbage bags and placed them in a U-Haul truck. She left the bags in Lake County and didn't report the death "because she wanted to keep cashing a monthly retirement check that the decedent was getting," authorities said.
A couple noticed the suspicious bags on the side of the road and called police. Some of the woman's extremities were missing.
An autopsy listed the cause of death as undetermined.





of course this happened in florida. this is why people shouldnt let their kids live with them after a certain age. it just isnt healthy and they become dependent on the parents income.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Official: Bride, groom stopped in Iraq actually terror suspects



BAGHDAD, Iraq (CNN) -- Soldiers manning a checkpoint near Baghdad stopped a wedding convoy to find that the purported bride and groom were wanted terror suspects, an Iraqi Defense Ministry official said Monday.


The army set up the checkpoint last week in the Taji area, about 12 miles (20 kilometers) north of Baghdad.
The soldiers became suspicious of the convoy because its members -- save the "bride" -- were all male and because one of the cars in the convoy did not heed orders to stop, the official said.
Also, soldiers said, the people in the car seemed nervous and the groom refused to lift his bride's veil when soldiers asked him to, according to the official.
Soldiers ordered everyone out of the car, the official said.
Upon inspecting the convoy, soldiers found a stubbly-faced man, Haider al-Bahadli, decked out in a white bride's dress and veil.
Bahadli was wanted on terror-related charges, as was his groom, Abbas al-Dobbi, the official said.
Two other terror-related suspects were detained as well.



they should have made them consumate the wedding before arresting them. this is really an indictment of iraqi women isnt it...........

Suprised?

CHAMPAIGN – Police are investigating a break-in at a Champaign business.
Someone broke a glass door at the Simply Amish store, 500 N. Walnut St., about 7:50 a.m. Friday, according to a Champaign police report.
Advertisement
A 42-inch plasma television with an estimated value of more than $2,500 was reported stolen. A stand for the television, a ceramic statue, a wall and a vinyl sign were damaged, along with the door, according to the report.
Anyone with information about the burglary is urged to call Champaign police at 351-4545 or Crimestoppers at 373-8477.




one thing i wouldnt imagine being stolen from a store named simply amish is a 42" plasma tv. i imagine that ran on candles..................

150,000 watch North Korean factory boss executed for 'making international calls'

Dictator Kim Jong Il has resumed executions in North KoreaA North Korean factory boss accused of making international phone calls was executed by a firing squad in front of 150,000 people, it emerged today.
The manager was gunned down in a sports stadium in South Pyongan province after authorities claimed he'd installed 13 in a basement to reach the outside world, the Good Friends aid agency revealed.
And six people were also crushed to death and 34 others injured in an apparent stampede as they left after the execution, it was claimed.
The factory chief's death last month came as executions in the communist dictatorship began increasing after a seven-year decline in the number of people publicly killed.
North Korea had faced a barrage of international criticism over claims it has executed many innocent people.
Its citizens are banned from communicating with the outside world, part of the regime's authoritarian policies seeking to prevent any challenge to the iron-fisted rule of Kim Jong Il.
The North has carried out four other similar public executions by firing squad against regional officials and heads of factories in recent months, Good Friends revealed.
"It is aimed at educating (North Koreans) to control society and prevent crimes," the group's head Venerable Pomnyun said in a press conference.
Good Friends gave no exact figures of the public executions this year, although the group has a good reputation as previous reports of what was happening in the country have later been confirmed.
Its report came a week after a UN General Assembly committee adopted a draft resolution expressing "very serious concern" at reports of widespread human rights violations in North Korea, including public executions.
The resolution, co-sponsored by more than 50 countries including the United States and many other Western nations, was sent to the 192-member General Assembly for a final vote.
The North has condemned the draft, saying it was inaccurate and biased.
The communist country insists it does not violate human rights, but it has long been accused of imposing the death penalty for political reasons, holding thousands in prison camps, torturing border-crossers and severely restricting freedom of expression and religion.





wow, what would i get for doing this blog during work. didnt we attack iraq because their leader did things like this........oh........thats right, north korea isnt sitting on a shitload of oil

those people really need to work on how they motivate people

Driver arrested on drug charges

Annapolis police seized about $32,000 in crack cocaine Thanksgiving morning after a traffic stop.Annapolis police spokesman Officer Hal Dalton said police were called when the driver threatened to ram the Pesce Grande Italian Grille and Bistro building with his Lincoln Town Car after an argument there.Officers pulled over the car and gave the driver, Jermaine Jerod Brown, 20, of Glen Burnie, sobriety tests. After he was arrested, police said, a search turned up two bags of crack - about 330 grams - and a digital scale.

Police said Brown was charged with drug possession with intent to distribute and issued citations for drunken driving, violation of alcohol license restriction and violation of provisional license restriction.Two passengers were also charged with drug possession with intent to distribute.





why is anyone suprised that people hauling drugs do stupid things. isnt hauling 32k in crack a stupid thing to start with.

Teen Arrested For Aiming Laser At Helicopter

PHOENIX (AP) ― Phoenix Police have detained a 13-year-old boy after he allegedly pointed a laser at a police helicopter Monday evening.Phoenix police say the helicopter was hit with a bright green laser light.The air unit officers circled around to see where the laser was coming from.Patrol officers found the suspect in the backyard of a central Phoenix residence with a green laser light in his possession.Police say the boy was taken into custody. He's facing charges of reckless endangerment.The boy is suspected of pointing a laser at other police and media helicopters.



he is also a suspect in the case of someone pointing a laser at his sister..............

Three Men in Women's Clothes Start Fight in Memphis

MEMPHIS, TN - They may have looked like women, but they weren't ladies.
Police in Memphis say they're working on a more detailed description of three men as women who came into a McDonald's restaurant with a tire tool and started swinging last night.
Restaurant employee Martez Brisco was working the drive-through window and he says there was an argument there. Brisco says when he ignored them tapping at the window, things got strange.
Police Lieutenant Trevor Tisby says the cross-dressers came inside and decided they wanted to fight with the restaurant crew.
Witnesses say the men hit the manager with a tire tool and when he swung back at them, kicked off stiletto boots and pulled off hoop earrings and jackets for a fight.
When it was over, the manager was taken to the hospital after being hit in the head with a "wet floor" sign and Albert Bolton was bandaged from where he said his attackers used their fingernails to scratch him.
Before they drove off, the three attackers smashed the drive-through window.





sure sounds like some classy cross dressers they got down in them parts. it is a great headline though.................

Wis. Man Upset Over Beer Shoots Goat

WAUPACA, Wis. (AP) - A man who was upset with his wife for not buying beer took vengeance by shooting one of the family's two pet goats, prosecutors say.
Peter W. Mischler, 48, was charged this week in Circuit Court with mistreatment of animals, possession of a firearm while intoxicated and disorderly conduct with a dangerous weapon.
The complaint said Mischler came home Saturday from hunting and became angry with his 22-year-old daughter for letting the goats out and making a mess. While she was talking on the phone to her mother, authorities said, he told her to tell his wife to bring home some beer, but his wife refused.
He then threatened to shoot the goats, according to the complaint.
After his wife arrived home, she and the daughter heard four gunshots and went outside and found one of the two goats with its entrails hanging out, authorities said. They said that goat had to be killed later by a sheriff's deputy.
Mischler posted a $1,000 cash bond set by Circuit Judge Raymond Huber and was released.
A hearing was scheduled for Dec. 4.



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that should teach that goat. what kind of asshole shoots the pets over not getting beer. someone should take all of his guns right now.............

Shooter Says He Mistook Cow for Coyote

COLFAX TOWNSHIP, Mich. (AP) - A man says he shot and killed a neighbor's cow after mistaking it for a coyote.
Authorities and the owner are skeptical.
The undersheriff in northern Michigan's Benzie County says he doesn't see how anyone could confuse a 1,400-pound, pregnant cow with a coyote, which typically weighs 20 to 45 pounds.
And anyway, shooting coyotes is illegal during deer-shooting season. Authorities asked the county prosecutor to bring charges.
The 42-year-old man told authorities he was out to shoot coyotes near his home Saturday when he killed the cow, Undersheriff Rory Heckman said. Heckman said the man then tried to drag the cow home.
"The part of his story he his holding to is he shot at a coyote. I don't know how he hit a several-thousand-pound cow mistaking it for a coyote," Heckman said.
The cow, named Hannah, had wandered away from her farm.



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how bad is his eyesight? do you really want him out in the woods at the start of deer season? somebody should just take all his guns from him right now...........

out of the us of a friends

diant, france....................................heywood, uk
sunbury, uk.....................................rochedale, australia
bremen, germany..........................muenster, germany
banwell, uk.....................................mariondo torinese, italy
athens, greece................................altena, germany
yelford, uk......................................melle, belgium
chene-bougeries, switzerland......reigates, uk
hethel, uk........................................potters bar, uk
vienna, austria...............................helsinki, finland
riyadh, saudi arabia......................vilnius, lithuania
riga, latvia......................................chesterfield, uk
hatfield, uk.....................................singapore, singapore
bracknell, uk..................................chuo, japan
polyanica, russian federation........jinan, china
hatch end, uk..................................bucharest, romania


thanks for visiting

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

imagine that................

NEW YORK (AP) — American Red Cross President Mark Everson has resigned because of a relationship with a subordinate employee.


was she ringing the bell when he made that donation?................

Cypriot seeks to unravel curse with pants and egg

NICOSIA (Reuters) - Having marital problems? Have you tried putting egg in your underpants?
A woman in Cyprus is on trial for sorcery after pledging to shake off a curse apparently plaguing a man's relationship with his wife and mother-in-law.
The suggested remedy consisted of an egg, a spoon, a nail, some pubic hairs and underpants, local media reported on Friday.
"She cracked the egg into my underpants," the 37-year-old man told a district court in the capital Nicosia.
The elderly woman wanted some 5,000 Cyprus pounds (5,968 pounds) for her efforts, the man said, so he went to police.
Sorcery is banned in Cyprus though many people indulge in card readings and palmistry and read runes in coffee cups.







hell, i would have ruined his pants for half that money.

If you're so drunk that you have your 13-year old drive for you, better make sure he's sober

CLIO, Mich. - A police officer checking on a truck that got stuck in the mud at a city park was startled to find a 13-year-old boy behind the wheel. The officer also was surprised that the boy appeared to be drunk.
So did the teen's father, who was riding in the front seat. He told police that he had turned over the driving duties to his son because he'd had too much to drink.
Open containers of beer and liquor were found in the vehicle, said Clio Police Chief James McLellan.
"(The boy) even said he didn't want to drive because he was too drunk," McLellan told The Flint Journal for a story published Thursday.
The father, 41, is facing several misdemeanor counts, including child endangerment, allowing an intoxicated person to drive his vehicle and allowing an unlicensed minor to drive, police said.
The boy has been petitioned into juvenile court on charges that include driving while intoxicated, police said.
The pair were arrested the night of Nov. 8. They apparently were trying to get home when they turned into the park to turn around. The truck rolled off the pavement and became stuck in the muddy soil.


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how many things are wrong with this story? its too great a number to count. talk about a guy making bad decisions...........

Man jailed over hunting trip deaths

A driver who took his mates on a drunken late night rabbit shoot that ended in two of them being killed has been jailed for at least two years.
Paul Jacob Poduska, 27, was drunk when he drove the ute which rolled down an embankment, killing James Herbert, 26, and Kale Shaw, 18, who were riding in the vehicle's tray, the Victorian County Court heard.
Poduska was given a three-and-a-half year jail term, with a minimum two years, over the incident north-east of Melbourne in February 7, 2004.
Judge Jim Duggan acknowledged Poduska did not intend any harm for his two mates and that his offending was at the low end of the culpable driving scale.

"This is a tragic case, it's tragic for you and those close to you. The victims were close friends," Judge Duggan said.
He said it was remarkable the victims' families did not blame him for what happened and viewed it only as a tragic accident.
Poduska, a vineyard manager at the time, had a blood alcohol reading of between 0.08 and 0.1 when the ute rolled, the court heard.
He and his friends had been drinking at a hotel until the early hours of the morning and caught a taxi to the vineyard he managed in Tarrawarra, north-east of Melbourne.
They decided to shoot rabbits and Poduska drove his friends around the property in his 4WD Toyota HiLux work ute in darkness.
But they ventured off the track and as they approached long grass, the ute slipped down an embankment and rolled, crushing Mr Herbert and Mr Shaw who were in the tray.







Any story which includes the phrase "drunken late night rabbit shoot" is sure to end well.......right?

Two days after praying for rain, the Southeast gets hit with violent storms that rip the roof off a church

ATLANTA - A storm crashed through the Southeast and brought up to an inch of rain in parts of drought-stricken Georgia, but forecasters said the storm likely did little to ease the state's historic drought.
"The ground probably sucked it all up," said Vaughn Smith, a meteorologist with the National Weather Service in Peachtree City. "The ground is so dry, I seriously doubt if any of the lakes rose any."
The Wednesday storm packed lashing rain and powerful gusts, injuring at least nine in Tennessee.
The roof of a Baptist church in Tennessee's Marion County was heavily damaged, said Jeremy Heidt of the Tennessee Emergency Management Agency. Three children were hurt by flying glass and were taken to hospitals, said Heidt.
City Hall across the street from the church suffered minor damage, Heidt said, and an ambulance business next to it had heavy damage. A house also collapsed, but the residents went to the hospital themselves.
"I couldn't get the door open because the outside pressure and wind was so strong," said Justin Lawhorne, manager of Wendy's restaurant in Kimball.
County schools were closed Thursday due to the storm.
More than a quarter of the Southeast is covered by an "exceptional" drought — the National Weather Service's worst drought category. With water levels low, many Georgia residents are under conservation orders — such as a ban on watering lawns.
The rainfall came two days after Gov. Sonny Perdue led a prayer service on the steps of the state Capitol to beg the heavens for an end to the drought.







apparently god doesnt like to be interrupted.

Violence Counsellor Went Nuts Over Leaky Shower

Exclusive Violence Counsellor Loses Job For Beating Up His Live-In Lover
AN ANGER management counsellor has lost his job after beating up his partner.
Vince Hogg, 45, attacked Beverley Burns during a row at their Fife home.
The former psychiatric nurse tore the 42-year-old's hair out and slammed her against a wall.
The assault took place shortly after he had taken up his counselling post.
Yesterday Hogg, who admitted assault, was put on probation for 12 months. His lawyer, Joanne Smith, told a court he was to receive treatment for mental health difficulties
Hogg pulled out Beverley's hair and slammed her against a wall.
Her teenage daughter called the police after hearing her mum shouting for help.
When officers arrived, they found both the couple in tears.
Hogg was suspended by his employers, Fife NHS Trust, and has now been moved to a demoted post.
The couple split up after the attack but are now back together in their detached villa in Wormit, Fife.
Passing sentence, Sheriff Robert Anthony QC said: "The court will not tolerate such conduct. This cannot be tolerated in society in any circumstances."
Earlier, Cupar sheriff court heard how, at the time of the May 18 assault, the couple had been experiencing "some difficulties" in their relationship.
Divorced father-of-two Hogg regularly had furious rows with Beverley. Depute fiscal Joanna Nicholson said that the row erupted after Hogg had returned home at about 6.20pm.
She told the court: "The daughter heard him shouting at her mother.
"He was angry about the fact a shower was leaking and caused a carpet to get wet."
Ms Nicholson added that when the daughter went downstairs, she saw Hogg had grabbed hold of her mother who was trying to defend herself.
Hogg's lawyer, Joanne Smith, said he was to receive treatment for mental health problems.
She added: "Things have somewhat settled down since the offence."
But as a result of his conviction, there have been "serious consequences for his line of work".
She explained: "He is currently suspended on full pay but he is to return to work, albeit to a lower position."
Hogg has worked for the NHS in Tayside for 27 years, initially as a hospital porter.
He was heavily involved in the Zero Tolerance Campaign against domestic violence and had only recently taken up to his anger management role.
Writing on a Fife NHS web page about his job, he stated: "I aim to ensure that staff remain safe at work.
"They have the right to perform their duties without fear of abuse or violence."
Yesterday, as he left court, Hogg said: "It was a traumatic period in my life.
"I don't want to discuss things any more."
A spokeswoman for NHS Fife said last night: "We can confirm that this matter has been dealt with in accordance with the appropriate policies and procedures."







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what a trauma this must have been to set him off. who of us hasnt been really pissed off by the constant dripping? i know i killed a hooker once because of the faucet in the motel room.

Robber wields stapler

Kentucky - A man wearing a ski mask used a stapler to hold up an eastern Kentucky ice cream store - and briefly got away with $175, authorities said.
Gerald A Rocchi, 32, was arrested shortly after he flashed a chrome-plated stapler at an employee of The Ice Cream Shop in Ashland on Tuesday and demanded money, police said.
Ashland Police Captain Don Petrella said he didn't know if Rocchi planned to shoot staples at the shop's employees or use it as a blunt instrument if he didn't get the cash.
It didn't come to that because the employees handed over the cash, Petrella said.
Several witnesses saw Rocchi leave the shop and told police where he was headed, Petrella said. After arresting Rocchi, police searched his house and found money, a stapler and a ski mask, Petrella said.
Petrella said the stapler's chrome finish could have made it look like a gun "if someone didn't get a good look at it".
Rocchi was charged with first-degree robbery. He made his first appearance in Boyd District Court on Wednesday morning. He did not have an attorney at the hearing.





you dont need a bullet proof vest for this. technically you could have stopped him with about 15 sheets of paper. he didnt have an attorney?....he couldnt afford a gun.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

These people know headlines...........

Government Inspectors Come Down Hard on Penis Pasta




The largest chain of sex stores in Norway has received notification from government inspectors that some of its foods products are not being properly labeled for nutritional facts.
Penis pasta, candy cuffs and chocolate body paint were all singled out for violating food labeling regulations for not containing a list of ingredients.
One sexual adviser in the store, Kjersti Antonsen, told reporters 'We were a bit surprised to have the food safety authority on inspection. Food is not really our core product,' and added that the matter would be rectified.







i only added this story because of the headline...........

Next question.......

Man shot in downtown Trumann last week



Last Wednesday downtown Trumann was taken over by activity surrounding the shooting of William Lytle, 22, of Trumann.
Shortly before 4 p.m., a 16-year-old Trumann juvenile and an unidentified male got into a verbal confrontation. It was reported the juvenile then went into his residence and got a 30-30 lever-action rifle.
According to reports, Lytle approached the juvenile and asked him what he was doing with the gun and was then shot in the groin area by the juvenile. The bullet exited through Lytle’s buttock. He was transported to St. Bernard’s Medical Center where he was immediately operated on to stop bleeding and repair damage done by the bullet.
When police arrived on scene, the juvenile went back into his home. After speaking with Trumann Police Department Chief Larry Blagg on the phone, he turned himself in.
A gag order was placed on police personnel and lawyers in the case by Judge Steve Inboden last Thursday.





it probably wasnt the best question to ask.

V.P. Cheney Treated For Irregular Heartbeat


WASHINGTON (CBS) ― Doctors administered an electrical shock Monday to Vice President Dick Cheney's heart to restore it to a normal rhythm.The procedure was declared a success and Cheney left the hospital for home.Cheney, who has a history of heart problems, spent about 2½ hours at George Washington University Hospital after experiencing an irregular heartbeat early in the day.The condition was detected when Cheney was seen by doctors around 7 a.m. at the White House for a lingering cough from a cold. He remained at work throughout the day, joining President Bush in meetings with Mideast leaders."During examination he was incidentally found to have an irregular heartbeat, which on further testing was determined to be atrial fibrillation, an abnormal rhythm involving the upper chambers of the heart," said spokeswoman Megan Mitchell.She said Cheney went to the hospital around 5 p.m.




who knew that he had a heart. i mean , i knew he had a penis because hes been screwing the country for 6+ years but i never imagined that he had a heart....

Tennessee man forces his teen daughters to wear electric dog collars. Then the story gets creepy.

Tennessee man charged with raping daughters



KNOXVILLE, Tenn. (AP) - Tennessee authorities say a father is accused of raping two teenage daughters and forcing them wear electric dog collars. The father is charged with aggravated child abuse and two counts of rape. And his wife also faces charges. Prosecutors say she knew about the use of dog collars but not the alleged sexual assaults. She faces charges of aggravated child abuse and failure to report child abuse. They live in eastern Tennessee, near the Kentucky border. The husband and wife were identified in court, but The Associated Press is withholding their names to avoid identifying their daughters. The AP generally does not identify possible victims of sex abuse



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is it too late to vote for father of the year in that state. what kind of upbringing makes a person think this is acceptable. rather than voting them for parents of the year cant we just vote them off of the planet. we dont need these people infesting the gene pool anymore...........

Former fair worker guilty of asking minor for sex....

A former concession worker at the Montgomery County Agricultural Fair was convicted last week of soliciting sex from a minor after a two-day jury trial in Montgomery County Circuit Court.

It was the first-ever conviction for county prosecutors under a state law adopted in 2004 that makes it illegal to solicit minors for sex.
Gardner, 57, who now lives in Olean, N.Y., was working at the fair in 2006 when he called a phone number he saw on the wall of portable toilet at the fair, according to a statement released by the Montgomery County State’s Attorney’s Office on Thursday.
He made five calls over several days, and on the last call left a message on the 15-year-old’s voicemail, asking her to commit sex acts, said Seth Zucker, spokesman for the State’s Attorney’s Office.
Gardner faces up to 10 years in jail for the soliciting charge, as well as six years total from two other charges for misusing a telephone. He is scheduled for sentencing Dec. 20.
‘‘The State Attorney’s Office is committed to aggressively prosecuting those who solicit children for sexual activity,” State’s Attorney John McCarthy said in a statement. ‘‘We will continue to work to ensure that young people in our community do not become victims.”
Gardner’s lawyer, Alan C. Drew, did not return telephone calls from The Gazette. According to Zucker, Gardner admitted to calling the number, but denied having asked the girl for sex.
Marty Svrcek, executive director of Montgomery County Agricultural Center Inc., said that Gardner was an employee of a concessionaire, not the fair or the company that runs the midway.
Fair organizers worked with police when they arrived at the fairgrounds in Gaithersburg, Svrcek said. Gardner was fired immediately, he said.
He added that he was not aware of any other such incident at the fair.







let me get this straight...a carny called a number he found on the wall of a port a john and asked for sex from a minor. whats the big deal................

Why didnt i think of this.............

Underage drinking party ends with standoff



Waunakee - An underage drinking party that drew 50 to 70 youths turned into a standoff at a farm shed, with teens barricaded inside for about five hours, refusing calls by police and their parents to come out, officials say.Some of the teens intimidated others by wielding a sledgehammer, ax and rifle and insisting that no one should leave because anyone who did would be ticketed, including members of the Waunakee High School football team, according to a criminal complaint filed yesterday in Dane County Circuit Court.Sheriff's deputies arrived at the farm residence of Daniel and Jacklyn Kaltenberg in the Town of Westport early Sept. 30, just after midnight, in response to a report of an underage drinking party.Witnesses said those in the shed included Jacklyn Kaltenberg, 44, an elementary school teachers aide in the Waunakee district. She talked by cell phone with her husband as the standoff continued, the complaint said, but both Kaltenbergs later told investigators they weren't there.Jacklyn Kaltenberg was charged with selling alcohol to underage persons and resisting or obstructing an officer. Daniel Kaltenberg, 44, was charged with resisting or obstructing an officer. The three teens each face a charge of disorderly conduct while using a dangerous weapon.Most of the deputies left after about four hours. Two stayed in the immediate area, and one of them saw about 20 to 30 youths running to the farm across the street at about 5 a.m.Two of those who attended the party were cited on suspicion of underage drinking and possession of marijuana and drug paraphernalia.Waunakee School Superintendent Chuck Pursell said Tuesday that the district was still investigating the incident, but three students have been disciplined, and Jacklyn Kaltenberg was serving an unpaid suspension from her job.Pursell said no football players were disciplined during the team's run in the state Division 2 playoffs, which ended in the quarterfinals with a loss to DeForest Nov. 3, because the district's investigation hadn't determined any football players were at the party."We can't do something based on hearsay and rumor," Pursell said.One of the teens charged Tuesday is a member of the team.All five people facing charges have been scheduled for initial court appearances Nov. 26.




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why didnt i think of this when i was in high school. the police should have shot that shed full of tear gas and then left. of course no football players were disciplined. is it any wonder why football players are all screwed up as adults. and what does this say about the police force there. why didnt they just storm in and beat some kids with night sticks. these kids are lucky they live in farm country...anywhere else and they would be dead..................

Sports Bar Owner Rips Customer's Genitals


The owner of a popular Brooklyn Park sports bar is scheduled to appear in Hennepin County District Court this week on charges he assaulted a customer.
Brooklyn Park police said the incident happened last June at Blondie's bar. That's when a customer tried to cancel a food order and got into a dispute with the owner and bar staff. Police said the man had stopped there for a bite to eat between jobs.
Investigators say the owner, Thor Gunderson, even tried to stop the man from calling 911 for help. When police got to the bar, they say they found the customer bleeding and on the ground, restrained by Gunderson and a bouncer.
"At the hospital they determined he had an injury which was to his scrotum and that one of his testicles was actually torn loose," said Roehl.

just eat the damn food. how bad is it when your willing to have your nuts yanked off rather than eat the food. thats one tough restaurant.

Monday, November 26, 2007

I'm back................

ok, i'm back from vacation so you can start reading again.


and for christs sake ....leave some comments

TV star Hulk Hogan's wife seeks divorce



It has been reported that the wife of wrestler and reality TV star Hulk Hogan has filed for divorce.
Digital Spy reports that Linda Hogan, who has two children with the wrestling star, applied for the separation last week.
Hogan, whose real name is Terry Bollea, claimed the first he knew about the divorce was when newspaper reporters contacted him about it.

Bollea was told by the St Petersburg Times that the paperwork for a divorce had been sent to Pinellas County, to which he responded: "Thank you for the great information. My wife has been in California for about three weeks...Holy smokes. Wow, you just knocked the bottom out of me."
The couple were shown attending marital counseling sessions during their reality TV show Hogan Knows Best, but had reconciled onscreen at the end of the series which is shown on MTV.



i guess hogan doesnt know best. i guarantee he will have a young hot broad on his arm before you know it.

Group Names Naughty, Nice List Of Stores

Shoppers Urged To Avoid Stores That Censor Word 'Christmas'

LYNCHBURG, Va. -- A Christian advocacy group has some advice for Christians as they prepare to do their Christmas shopping: Don't shop at stores that censor the word "Christmas."
As part of its Friend or Foe Christmas Campaign, Liberty Counsel has released its fifth annual "Naughty and Nice" list of stores seeking to attract gift buyers.
The "Naughty List" names stores that make no mention of Christmas in their advertising, vaguely observing the "season" or "holiday" instead. The list includes Gap, Kohl's, Bloomingdale's and Marshalls, to name a few.
The "Nice List" consists of stores that still name the reason for the season. Some stores on that list include Macy's, Wal-Mart, Target and Toys R Us.
Both can be viewed on Liberty Counsel's Web site.
Liberty Counsel's Steve Crampton said stores have the right to advertise any way they want, but Christians have the right to shop at stores that recognize their holiday.


apparently this year christian kids will be getting the shittiest of gifts. of course the only thing crazier than stores not mentioning christmas is a christian group bitching about it. look, their not selling stuff at your church , dont bring your god to their stores.

now your even...........

Jingle bell brawl in Anaheim

Three mothers get into shoving match over place in line to see Santa Claus

ANAHEIM --The arrival of Santa Claus to the Anaheim Town Square shopping center was interrupted briefly Friday when three mothers -- one holding an infant – got into a shoving match over their place in line to see Saint Nick.
Security guards and event workers separated the women, who were shoving one another for nearly 30 seconds. No injuries were reported, and no arrests were made.
One mother claimed that she'd been saving her family's place in line since 9 a.m. for Santa Claus's noon appearance.
The mothers – all with children in tow – were lined up to see the "Jingle Bell Jump," which involved Santa Claus landing in the parking lot in a hot-air balloon.
The Jingle Bell Jump was an annual tradition at Anaheim Town Square that featured Santa Claus parachuting into the shopping center. After Sept. 11, 2001, a no-fly zone was enacted in a three-mile radius around Disneyland. Anaheim Town Square falls within the restricted area by a quarter-mile.
The first 300 people at the shopping center on the corner of corner of Lincoln Avenue and State College Boulevard received free T-shirts.


sing with me.....

jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell brawl...................

ok so it doesnt go as well as the original but it does fit the season. mrs pissed wanted to go out on friday but i explained that unless there was something you couldnt live without then there was no real good reason to near a mall on that day.

Bad vibrations over car love toy

A SEX aid that plugs into car cigarette-lighter sockets is being given away at an X-rated exhibition this weekend—to the fury of motoring groups.
The new Rabbit Travel Vibe, which makers claim is "perfect for long journeys", has been put in VIP goodie bags at London's Erotica show.
But last night an RAC spokeswoman warned the aid could be LETHAL for distracted motorists. She said: "Don't use it while driving."
The purple 4ins gadget is designed to fit in glove compartments.
Maker Top Cat boasts it offers 12 volts of "pure vibrating ecstasy" and "complete satisfaction on the move". It can also be used in trucks, caravans and boats.



dont drink and ....what? i am going to imagine that this is made for the passenger

NZ men 'pressured' to have sex

Wellington - Nearly one-in-three New Zealand men say they have felt pressured to have sex or did so unwillingly, according to a newspaper survey published on Sunday.Urban men in their late 30s and early 40s were most likely to say they had been victims of unwanted advances by women, the Sunday Star- Times reported, quoting a national survey of more than 5 600 men.The survey showed that men in their 20s were more loyal to their current partners than those in their late 30s and early 40s, an age group in which nearly one-in-four admitted having affairs.The survey found that 29 percent of male New Zealand teenagers were virgins, a condition most changed in their early 20s when the proportion dropped to 6 percent.


who thought sheep were so demanding. let me just say "for the record" that i have never been "pressured" into sex........

Flaming Lingerie Prompts K-Mart Evacuation

ORANGE COUNTY, Fla. -- Police are searching for a shopper who set some lingerie on fire inside an Orange County K-mart store and then fled.
Hundreds of shoppers were evacuated from the K-Mart located on Orange Blossom Trail over the burning clothes.
Firefighters were called to the business and eventually extinguished the flames.
Police are checking surveillance video for clues in the case, Local 6 reported.
Watch Local 6 News for more on this story.



after reading the headline was there any question in your mind as to where this happened.......

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Happy thanksgiving.................


if you are one of the fortunate people in the world whos sitting down to a dinner tonight then you have everything to be thankful for....................

Friday, November 16, 2007

Florida day.............

i always thought texas was the single most screwed up state in the union but ....i stand corrected. just when i was going to hand out the award up stepped florida....and step up they did.

i was going to post one good florida story a week...and then it changed to one a day but now i nedd to put a whole slew of them because ...well....florida really stepped up.

enjoy these.........................

Florida story of the day.....

Suspect in stand-off: I just `sell weed'



The suspected drug dealer who ran from his car, hid in a Miami Gardens house and sparked a tense police standoff this week told investigators he was just a lowly marijuana peddler.
''I don't want to incriminate myself, but that was some good fire weed in the car,'' Troy McClean told police, according to a police report.
Miami-Dade police found a stolen Glock 9mm handgun inside the glove compartment of McClean's car and several bags of marijuana.
McClean was charged Monday with armed occupied burglary with battery, false imprisonment, possession of a firearm by a convicted felon and grand theft.
Miami-Dade police say McClean was driving a gray 2008 Chrysler that fit the description of one reported in an armed carjacking about 3 p.m. Monday.
An officer tried pulling him over at Northwest 197th Avenue and Sixth Avenue -- but he sped off, according to an arrest report.
Bailing out of the car, McClean ran through several backyards before running into a home at 765 NW 185th Dr., pushing his way inside and hiding behind a washing machine.
Three people inside went running out.
Miami-Dade's Special Response Team eventually smoked him out by shooting gas canisters inside the house.
He told police that he only drove off because he had an open beer can inside the car.
McClean stressed that he ''was not a bad person'' and that all he does is ''sell weed,'' according to a police report.



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just like "the man" trying to keep an honest working man down.

Florida story of the day..............

Pasco Woman Found Dead In House Full Of Dogs




HUDSON - When Pasco Fire Rescue went to the home of an elderly woman Wednesday morning, they found her dead and the home filled with 20 dogs and dog feces.
The Pasco County Sheriff's Office is investigating the death of the woman, who appeared to be in her 70s or 80s, but do not suspect foul play, sheriff's office spokesman Doug Tobin said.
"One detective working the case said it was the worst condition he's ever seen in a home," Tobin said wrote in a news release.
It appears the woman had moved into her garage and let the dogs live in the house at 16034 Frost Drive, he said. The house, which had not been cleaned of dog feces for some time, he said.
Pasco Emergency Management, Animal Control and Hazmat were called to assist. No decision has been made as to whether the house will be condemned.
Deputies still were on the scene at 7:10 p.m., Tobin said.




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this woman really loved her dogs. i'm just glad she wasnt my neighbor....................

Florida story of the day.........

Unzipped man takes swing at deputy



A 21-year-old Laurel Hill man who was pulled over for erratic driving ended up being charged with resisting an officer with and without violence, in addition to the charge of DUI refusal. Adam Phillips of Fourth St. was traveling north on State Road 85 mid-afternoon on Nov. 10 when an Okaloosa County Sheriff’s Office deputy noticed that his SUV was crossing back and forth across the median line. When the deputy approached him, Phillips, who was not wearing a seat belt, told him, “I don’t have time for this (expletive),” according to the offense report. Phillips had difficulty finding his license although the deputy could clearly see it in the plastic window of his wallet. The deputy suspected that he had been drinking and asked Phillips to step out for a field sobriety test. That’s when the deputy noticed that Phillips' pants were unzipped and unbuttoned. Phillips fastened them, then stuck his hand down the front of his pants, the report noted. The deputy was concerned that the man might have been retrieving a weapon, so frisked him down. During the search, Phillips “turned his upper body towards me in an aggressive manner with his fists still clenched as if he was preparing to punch me,” the deputy wrote. When asked why his pants were unzipped, Phillips referred to a sexual act that had been taking place and said that he was heading home for more. The female in the car told the deputy that she didn’t know why Phillips’ pants were undone and she denied any sexual conduct taking place in the car. The deputy noted eight empty Miller Lite bottles in the vehicle. Phillips was taken to jail, where he refused to listen to anything, claiming he had “learning disabilities.” The deputy let him read the implied consent document, but Phillips refused to answer when asked if he understood it. Later in the process, Phillips took a swing at the deputy and was restrained.




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at least this guy was honest. hes getting a hummer while going home for more. he really didnt have time for this shit. why isnt this on cops..............