Tipsy moose beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Bull moose strung with lights and tipsy on crab apples

What do you call a bull moose tangled in Christmas lights and drunk on fermented crab apples, standing glassy-eyed and dizzy in the front yard of a downtown bar?
(answer at the end)

But seriously, the juiced moose had certainly seen better days than Tuesday, when he became a bewildered tourist attraction, parked in the courtyard of Bernie's Bungalow Lounge as shoppers clicked by with their Nordstrom bags.

After Town Square Park, the moose squeezed into the courtyard at Bernie's, where he settled in a pile of crab apples and eventually assumed a disoriented stance, staring into space, snorting steam. What was on his moose mind? Was he dreaming of chewing spring buds or sleeping in the tall summer grass? Was he filled with crab-appletini regret? Hard to say.
"He's just been in the same spot since I got here," said Gina Senior, a bartender at Bernie's. "He's not really doing much except standing there."
You can't do much for a drunk moose except wait for him to sober up, Sinnott said. And he's in a pretty good place -- among Bernie's fountains and yard sculptures, behind a hedge, safe from passing traffic.

this reminds me of my friends dad. at christmas he would get all pissed drunk and stagger around outdoors. maybe he was reincarnated.....

btw the answer is buzzwinkle............