we all have those wonderful memories of our mothers as we grew up. hopefully yours is still around, mine isnt. my mom would have been the cool mom, not sylvia johnson cool, but coll none the less. whos sylvia johnson you ask? well sylvia was the cool mom in golden colorado. she never fit in when she was in school but by being the cool mom she said she felt like she belonged to the group. she fit in. how do you get to be cool? you give alcohol and drugs to your kid and his friends. ok, you've attained coll status. nothing that some beer and a doob or a line of blow to make you fit in. hell, it made me semi-cool in high school. sylvia, though, wasnt satisfied. she worked her brain overtime trying to figure out a way to be even cooler...if that were possible. it was possible. having sex with his friends would make her cooler. if one of my friends mom was hot i would have wanted to have sex with her. hell, in high school, i would have had sex with one of her shoes....i wasnt picky. unfortunately the authorities didnt think sylvia was that cool. maybe she should have let them do a line of blow off her her shoulder while having sex with them but hindsight is 20/20. she pleaded guilty to two misdemeanor counts of sexual assault and nine felony counts of contributing to the delinquency of a minor. bad break sylvia, maybe you'll be the cool mom in prison because sylvia was sentenced to 30 years in prison. she'll be 71 when she gets out so chances are she can be the cool grandma then.
in a related story a 37 year old woman was arrested in georgia. what was she arrested for shoes? i'll ask, you werent going to. well she was arrested one day after she married one of her sons 15 year old friends. they were married in the driveway of a retired judge. she also announced that shes pregnant with his child. now the reason i brought this up is not just the humor here but the fact that even though i'm a reverand in the universal life church of modesto california i cant do weddings here. why? am i less responsible than this retired judge. what is he thinking? does he really think this was a good idea. i will go on record now and tell you that i wouldnt have done that.
well, good luck to the cool moms...everyone else, enjoy your weekend.