Thursday, November 03, 2005

Back to the future..........

whats with bush now listening to scientists when refering to the bird flu. isnt he afraid that the religious right will be pissed. did god tell him to consult the scientists. maybe after all the hurricanes he quit listening to god. ok, thats crazy thoughts, i know but is his defense its easier to spell god than science. he remembers it by thinking of dog and then reversing it. maybe if the scientists can save the day we can get back to teaching science and not "intelligent design". maybe we can stop the war on science.

gail otoole and ken slaby used to date. when they broke up ken found another girl quickly......gail didnt. while ken was taking a nap at gails house one day (can you say booty call) gail put her plan into action. the plan she had been thinking about ever since the breakup. gail superglued kens penis to his stomach then took his clothes and car keys and threw him out. ken walked a mile to a convenience store, found a cop that drove him to a hospital and is now in court with a civil suit against gail. the moral of the story.........dont fall asleep at an ex girlfriends house. woman can really be a vindictive group.

in texas evangelina sanchez gonzalez seems to use toll booths the last 20 months shes had the opoortunity to go through them over 2900 times. the tolls would come to a total of approximately 1800 dollars. but alas eva decided to just run them sometimes. why pay the toll. maybe she was short on change that day. maybe she was in a hurry. she must have been because she ran the toll booths over 2900 times. her fines are 42 times what the tolls would have been. eva now owes the state of texas 76k. aye carumba.

in japan a 16 year old girl is under arrest for slowly poisoning her mother. she got caught by posting it on her blog. apparently not all japanese children are ahead of our kids. this isnt a rocket scientist here. i only tell you this because as a reader of this blog i am slowly poisoning your minds. i wont write about it again for fear that i will get caught and then some dumbass (such as myself) will write about me like i am writing about the stupid 16 year old japanese girl.

get to work now. you've wasted enough time already.


halcyon67 said...

Who would post a crime on their blog? In my opinion she deserves to go to jail

As always... Rachael said...

I'm surprised that dude wasn't busted for indecent exposure... it doesn't matter that you got shang-hai'd - you're naked aren't you?? LOL

Shit what was the next story that's weird I forgot, so I opened a new window... and I got someone else. I'm confused.

Japanese girl should realize that the best way to ruin the perfect crime is to open your big fat mouth. Sure, I got Jake tied up in the basement right now. I call in to work for him saying he's sick... then I'll call in next tuesday saying I was lying, he got a better job and we're moving. It was all a ruse. I'll tell my family he left me for a hooker, and I won't have to tell his family shit as long as I keep forwarding sports articles.

The plan isn't perfect yet, but I'm working on it. I have some pretty avanced ideas on weapon disposal, but the crime still isn't perfect.

Please don't tell Jake (or the cops) of my plan to murder. It would would piss me off nad I'd... I'd... I'd take your ass off my Christmas card list!