Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Running late today............

sorry this post is a little late today. i had my vasectomy done this morning and didnt get into work until about ten oclock. thats right you mf'ers...i had it done this morning and came to work. yeah, i'm tougher than the picture paints. to anyone whos had this done nothing will be new but if you havent had it done its too bizarre. first i had this done in the hospital...not outpatient. i had too wear one of those short nighties that has no back and then when i get into the operating room they hose me down with enough betadine solution to drown my boys. after swearing to the nurse and anethesiologist (that aint spelled right) that if i heard one of them giggle i would hunt them down and kill everyone that they loved we began. a shot of novacaine at 7:30 am will really wake you up unlike a cup of decaf ever will then the doctor yanks on my nuts like he trying to take the lugnuts off of his bmw all the while asking me if i'm ok. does anyone ever answer honestly like "hey doc your rippin my sack off". i doubt it. i did point out that he was treating my balls just like my ex wifes lawyer...only more gently. two nuts and a half hour later i was done. in the door at 6:30 am and out by 8:30 am. sure my dignity was gone but when am i ever going to see those people again. i brought a bag of peas to work in case i need to sit on something cold but actually my stomach hurts more. i think its cause he squeezed my balls so hard. let me mention that there is absolutely nothing normal about another man grabbing your junk (unless thats what your into.......and i'm not). i had to get very zen about this whole procedure. well i think i'll go thaw some peas on my balls for a while. maybe my wife will be happy because i helped to make dinner.

so, now hows your tuesday

6 comments:

BAC said...

Shoes,
I was worried you were sick. I'm sure you are glad it's over. You are tough even if your not as tall as you would like. Hope the healing goes well and you will be back in the saddle soon. I'm afraid it will be sometime before I eat peas again.

Blade90 said...

Nutty, nutty, stuff today! Awesome blog! You are a well-rounded person. Please keep the ball in your court. Don't blow your wad on one blog, sack it away for future blogs to come. Hope the healing goes well!

SRH said...

Damn shoes, if anything should give one the right to take a day off from work, getting the big "snip" should be that one thing. I would say that your comments today are all going to center around euphamisms about your family jewels.

Patsy Darling said...

Oh man a guy I work with had his snipped and things went haywire. His left ball is now twice the size of normal. It will never shrink. Better luck with yours.

shoes said...

my wife was hoping my penis would blow up to twice the size..but alas...no such luck

ccw said...

Oh, I am LMAO over the image of you stitting at work with frozen peas on your nuts.

Glad it went well, or as well as a procedure involving your balls could go. Hope you feel better soon!