funnies

DOUBLE DELIVERY: Police in Lower Southampton, Penn., stopped William
Bethel Jr., 24. He was driving a mortuary body delivery service van,
yet when they pulled him over he was in the middle of several
deliveries for Domino's Pizza. Bethel admitted he was using the same
vehicle for pizza and bodies since he was able to get an extra shift
doing pizza delivery, and his car was in the shop. But, he said, he
wasn't transporting dead bodies and pizza at the same time. When the
mortuary service heard of the transgression, Bethel was fired. Bethel,
who admitted he shouldn't have been driving at all since his license
was suspended, was cited for driving a commercial vehicle without a
current inspection certificate, and driving with a suspended license.
He said he hopes to be a mortician some day. (Bucks County Courier
Times) ...Bodies delivered in 20 minutes or less or your embalming is
free.


HEY, HERE'S AN IDEA: A student at Winona (Texas) High School, with the
approval of a physics teacher, was setting up a "cannon" involving
gunpowder and a metal tube. "It's like a small little tube," said
school Superintendent Rodney Fausett. "It shoots a little projectile in
the air." As the 11th-grader packed the powder in, it exploded. The
"small little tube" went "through the wall of the building -- a metal
wall -- so it had a pretty good oomph to it," said an investigator from
the U.S. Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives. The
explosion tore off the 17-year-old student's entire hand. "This is just
an isolated accident," Superintendent Fausett explained. Parents told
investigators they had expressed concern over the project before the
explosion, but school officials ignored their complaints. (Dallas
Morning News) ...Showing once again "zero tolerance" should apply to
school officials, not the students.


i love people. they do the funniest things. lets break this down. do you really want a pizza thats delivered from a hearse.....even if a body isnt in there with it? in what world does this guy feel this is a good idea? i am still trying to figure out a way to make extra money while i work. maybe i can sell crack out of my office window to the whores in the street. that may work. as for the other story, thank god none of my teachers ever gave me a tube and some gunpowder while i was in school. i would have blown my arm off. this may be just an isolated accident but i guarantee that the teacher lost his job and the school district will be shackled with a huge lawsuit.

ok, lets all just try and get through wednesday. so far this week i've had two mondays.