Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Utah, do we really need it.....

utah is such a weird little state. what have they given us? mormons (great the religion that makes scientology seem plausible), the osmonds (the jacksons without rhythm)...etc. we really dont need them do we?
they do have some ideas for the country though. they seem to know just what the problems facing our country are and exactly who to blame. According to The Salt Lake Tribune, Utah County District 65 Chairman Don Larsen has submitted a formal resolution to oppose the devil’s plan to destroy the country -- to be discussed this weekend at the Utah County Republican Convention.
thats right kids if you really want to blame someone for trying to destroy the United States, point the finger at… Satan? And Satan’s apparent weapon of choice: Allowing illegal immigrants to cross the border.
i knew that my dislike of mexicans was well founded. i reemeber that from the bible where it is written "and god spake unto moses and said, "keep the darkies out", and moses then carried the message unto the people". dont press me for what book thats in i just remember the passage.
as don likes to put it....“In order for Satan to establish his ‘New World Order’ and destroy the freedom of all people as predicted in the scriptures, he must first destroy the U.S.,” Larsen’s resolution states. “[It is] insidious for its stealth and innocuousness.”Larsen’s proposal to defeat Satan? Close the borders to illegal immigrants to “prevent the destruction of the U.S. by stealth invasion.”
lets make all of america as lilly white as utah. lets all just put on our bobby socks and play our pat boone albums while standing around deciding who gets the boot next.

to answer the first question....nobody. lets throw utah out. lets just split up the state among the surrounding states and call it a day. 49 state is ok. if your stuck on the thought of 50 the lets just make puerto rico the 50th. most of them are already in nyc.

ok, back to work kids. this is shoes.....over and out.......

4 comments:

BAC said...

I think the book of the bible you couldn't remember was The Book of Imus.

Judith said...

are you sure the mormons arent referring to george damien bush??

shoes said...

i cant be sure of that at all.....

curmudgeon said...

Close the borders to illegal immigrants to “prevent the destruction of the U.S. by stealth invasion.”
If that's what it takes, I'm for it!